Excuse me hon, the Don mean no harm, turn around again
****** backyard's bangin like a Benz-i
If I was ziggy, you'd be spotted like Spudz McKenzie

Ghostface off Ice Cream

Or as the bajan saying goes An eyeful is sometimes better than a bellyful.

Barack boy ya best be careful cause when Michelle see this picture wuhloss lol


Chupse juss tell she ya married not blind.

ps: thought it was funny that this was the photo the Toronto Star decided to run on its front page today too. I wonder what dem trying to imply.

A groundbreaking study, to be released today, estimates that about one in four black, single parents and households on social assistance face moderate to severe discrimination in Toronto's tight rental market. The same is true for South Asians.

Read more here.

Everytime I read about one of these studies I think to myself well whats groundbreaking about this? Its just a waste of time and money to prove the already known. Then I read the comments responding to articles like the one above on the Toronto Star's website and realize most Torontonians truly are clueless to the discrimination that persons of color and those on the lower end of the wealth spectrum face in this community.

Maybe they just live with their heads in the sand or maybe they just accept all the stereotypes and the scary news items they see every day in the media about those that don't look like them. Maybe they're all we are the world and Kumbaya and think we live in a post-racial world. Well newsflash that post-racial crap is b.s. I don't know what they actually think but what I do know is that renters bias is all too real having faced it in the past myself.

And I'm not alone, in fact forget a one in four most of the black folk I know can tell you a story or two about renters bias. How the apartment suddenly was rented when they showed up for a viewing because the landlord didn't realize they were black when they phoned or how they suddenly needed to book an appointment when they walked in to see a place even though someone else they knew had checked the place out the day before by just walking in off the street or and these two happened to me personally, my girlfriend's potential apartment ended up being apparently already rented when she showed up with me (scary black dude that I apparently am) in tow (even though I wasn't going to be living there) or how one landlord told me and I quote "his Jamaicans don't cause trouble".

This is everyday life. We dont like it, but it happens. We get angry when it happens, we complain, we get ignored but we minorities, persons of color know it happen. And we deal with it and we survive. We cope, we grow thicker skins, we gain a knowledge by experience of what kinds of landlords will discriminate, we look where we think we'll be accepted and ignore other areas where we know we'll be discriminated in and end up in mini-ghettos, we do what we have to do to get by.

And its not like so many on the Toronto Star's message board surmise that we aren't rented these apartments because we're on welfare or we destroy property or we're bad neighbours and have loud raucous parties or we have bad credit or we default on our rent and then the landlord has hell to evict us. Most of us don't get a chance to disprove these stereotypes because we aren't given a chance. We don't even get to see the apartment let alone rent it. Or we get to see it but unless the deal is consummated on the spot when we return or call again the place is gone (which is why when I was looking at places I learned to walk with my cheque book ready to close a deal on the spot). It starts and ends at the beginning, with a judgment call made by those with the power based on our non-Canadian accents or our non-Canadian skin tones. Nope its rented, or we wont rent it to you, meaning sorry we don't want your kind here now go away.

Just cause your racism isnt the in your face stuff the US faces doesn't mean everything is hunky doory up on your doorstep. It does still exist. That's the real. Toronto I wish y'all would wake up and realize that instead of living with your heads up your proverbial butts.

and dem thought Nipplegate was a issue.

Back in the days the worse thing ya had to worry bout was seeing Mommy kissing Santa under the mistletoe or maybe a fella might try an sneak into school wid a Playboy or something so but now

A local teacher accidentally put pornography into a DVD that was meant to be filled with school memories from the past year, and nobody caught the error until after it was sent home, shocking parents and students alike.

De woman gone an put pieca one of her own sex tapes on the children tape. Well I guessing I know what will be the top memory for them children for the past year lol.

You imagine you turn on the dvd to show you parents memories of jungle gyms, innocent plays and recitals, and running bout the schoolyard and all a sudden um cut into dem sorta big people things with your teacher giving new meaning to the phrase wham bam thank you mam! Wha dat wud traumatize even big people cuhdear.

Well even if this teacher doan get fired I hope she remove themselves from the vicinity of them traumatized children. I know if I did a parent and I did see dat I couldn't be in nuh sorta parent teacher meetings widout looking at she a certain way. And ya dun know discipline gone through the door in class too cause some day teacher say something an some igrant lil fast chile gine put she in she place bout that tape and hush she up one time bram.

an how come nuhbody din notice this thing on the tape though? I mean we is a people that see janet nipple fa 1/2 a second a everybody din see um, how come them din see however much of the teacher porn did on the tape cause i sure um was more than six seconds.

But ya know I been discussing this sex tape business. (No before wunnah ask wunnah cud search high and low there aint no Jdid sex tapes knocking bout and there never will be cause i aint embarrassing myself nor looking to traumatize nun a wunnah. In fact I feel if I ever was to do something so I wud traumatize myself too. After seeing that, I might gotta guh join a monastery and tek a new vow of chastity or something. cuhdear)

But what is the thing wid everybody mekkin sex tapes these days? Um is because digital equipment suh cheap? Or um is that everybody fancies themselves some sorta porn star? Is it that we are a nation of voyeurs? Or is just that people aint got nuh sorta common sense cause if ya mek it chances are ya gine mislay it at some point or the other and then bram embarrassment galore.

Well unless ya is a celebrity and then um will mek ya a superstar like Paris, de Kardasian girl or Ray J.

So July the 1st is/was Canada day. Besides being in the middle of the week which sucks for holidays , we in Toronto are in the grips of a city workers strike which affected quite a bit of festivities including parades and the like. Well whatever!

Was having some deep thoughts though. Is why we duz call Independence day up here Canada day? I mean the fourth of July, American Independence day dont be called no U.S.A day and I never hear Independence day in places like Barbados or St Vincent or Jamaica called Barbados day or St Vincent day or Jamaica day. So wha um is bout Canadians that they cant settle for a simple Independence day?

And then we was discussing it today after we went to a Canada day thing today and say well is how come at a Canada day celebration they sing O'Canada but them also duz sing God Save the Queen. So I say well is cause the Queen is still head of state which mean well are we really independent cause early this year when the political parties was having them bassa basssa and parliament came to a standstill who um was that had the final say on whether we was gine have an election or PM Harper was gine stan in power? Um was the Governor General. And who is the Governor General. Well um is Michelle Jean but who she is? She is the Queen representative. So in essence the Queen up in Buckingham palace still run things in Canada so nuh wonder we aint calling it Independence day.

Oh well.

Do you remember the time when Michael was a pop icon rather than tabloid fodder?

At the end he was more bogeyman than boogie-man, more monster than hero, more goat than G.O.A.T, more caricature than role model but there was a time when Michael apparently was a cool inspiration to black folks and loved by everyone worldwide. But that was a while back wasn't it?

My wife reminded me this morning that when the Thriller album came out Michael made it cool to be black in North America. He made black music commercially viable and gave it MTV appeal. I also hold him personally responsible for the horror that was the jeri curl era but in some parts of the world Michael Jackson was the first black person that anyone had ever seen ever. You see those suburban white kids imitating today's rappers? Well the original cross-over appeal artist was Michael, white glove and all. Everyone loved Michael (even Prince fans).

Without Michael there would be no Puffy, no Jay Z, no Chris Brownes, no Ushers.

And man could he dance!

Now Michael is known as much for his antics as for his music. Its all very plain to see in the nickname he was given "Wacko Jacko". For every Beat it, there is a but the dude had a zoo at Neverland story, for every Black or White there is a he walked around in a SARs mask for years rebuttal and lets not even go into the Michael and Bubbles and Michael and little children stories or the dangling small child off balcony acts, the bankruptcy rumours and the crazy marriages etc.

Dude became one of those stories you shook your head at. A walking tragedy, someone to be pitied. Poor Michael, all that talent, all that fame, still crazy as ass. What happened to that cat? Some blamed his dad, some said he never grew up, some said he was taken advantage of or was just missing some screws up top. Who knows!

What I can say is that a lot of the boo hoo hoo I miss him stories that will circulate in the coming days are a bunch of crap and highly hypocritical and come from the people who two days ago were more than likely dissing or laughing at ol boy.

Come on now, dude had become a caricature. Forget the don't speak ill of the dead credo and admit it. You know it, I know it. In fact when last did you make a Michael duz trouble lil children crack or passed around a Michael now looks like a white woman email or dissed his ever changing nose? Exactly! This is what Michael had become of late so don't try to cover it up.

It is what it is. But it just goes to show you that opinions and life can change in a matter of minutes. The same ones dissing him yesterday are now the ones showering him with praise today. Guess you cant get all your props til you're gone.

He was great, his recording legacy may stand the test of time, he was definitely a trailblazer, one of the greatest dancers and entertainers and he was the King of Pop, but like many prodigies and icons over the years Michael got old and somewhat irrelevant music wise and his eccentricities became his hallmark later in life. (Apparently the lucky ones die young. Imagine if Tupac and Biggie or Bob Marley had lived past their primes?)

Michael went from the King of Pop to King of Weird. He's gone now and some will feel guilty and realize dude regardless of his eccentricities was one of a kind and we will miss him now. But who will be remembered: 1982 Michael, cocky, vibrant, inspirational leaving us all welled up with pride or 2009 Michael peeping out from behind a mask, dodging creditors and crazy rumours, leaving us feeling sorry for him.

Rappers and comedians will have to find a new celebrity for fodder as will we.

Rest in Peace Michael may you be less troubled now than in life.


ps: For anyone interested Smoking Section has a nice DJ Jaycee mix of some the older MJ tunes from the Jackson five era available for free download here.

I did never even hear bout these Jon & Kate people til they interview them about Octo-mom a few months back and now they all over the news cause Jon and Kate divorcing or separating or something so.

But let me tell you something. I never watch the show but is how this get a reality show when the people cant even throw one setta liks in the children? You could imagine you or mi mudda raising 8 a we and nuh liks sharing? Wha dat would to quote the singer man be "far from reality'.

And apparently Kate finally lash one a few weeks back an the tabloids was all over she. One lil lash and dem vex. So so far from my reality cause I know if you and mi mudda had 8 children liks would share from mornin til night and not nuh lil liks too but good ol west indian pick up whatever implement nearest to ya an throw with unerring accuracy at the child who mekkin ya miserable type liks.

But anyways. I wanted to say a few things bout the show and remember I aint watch um but I just find it strange that you wud put your children all over the tv screen from so early. Is like dem pimp out the poor children.

The question though is wha gine happen to the children now. Is it better for them to be raised by a single parent or in an unhappy home? I'd go with the former.

And whichpart Jon gine find Chile support fa 8 pickney! lawd ave mercy boy!

Well somebody tell muh a few weeks back that one a my old bajan posts "Two Words" was referenced in Wikipedia under some bajan dialect thing. And in the spirit of sharing more bajan words wid wunnah and given my present state of existence I have decided to share the phrase "fall way to nuttin".

The term "fall away to nuttin" in the simplest form means to lose alot of weight. It would be used if you see a drastic weight loss by somebody or maybe in a full sentence like "ya better try an eat before ya fall way to nuttin" where the speaker is trying to convey the thought that not eating will make you lose weight.

And why is this pertinent you ask? Well Jdid had his wisdom teeth removed a few weeks back and was forced onto a liquid diet. Now the people that know me know that I aint exactly robust, big or have nuh weight to lose in the first place. Yet via said liquid diet I lost somewhere north of 12 pounds in the space of one week. And yea you feel alot colder and smaller when that happens. Your body isnt meant to lose weight like that I'm guessing.

Yesterday I was out in the garden wearing a old pants that I retire from active service cause the waist was getting a lil too tight an you shoulda see how the pants fit me yesterday baggy baggy like Hammer Pants den. The things did threaten to expose muh bividees so I had to guh back inside an get a belt before I gi de neighbours a free show.

The liquid and soft food diet thing thought me alot though. For one see me I aint gine mek it as nuh old person cause I man doan dig no soft foods, no mashed potatoes nor no soups (hence the drastic weight loss) so when I get old I doan think I gine last too long once the gums stop wukkin.

Anyway that was about three weeks ago and since then I've been back trying to steadily add more and more foods to my diet. Still not ready for no burgers, steak or curry goat yet but I was getting there.

And then this weekend bram out of the blue while eating lunch I had this new dental issue flare up (which is apparently related to the wisdom teeth removal). Anyway it has again left me in some real serious pain and according to the dentist this marnin back on the liquid diet, unable to eat solid foods yet again. And since I probably gained back at most 3 or 4 of the 12 pounds lost on the last liquid diet Jdid will be steadily fallin way to nuttin this week looking like a "god-horse" cause I eating "nextskin to nuttin". I gine leff dem two last bajan phrases to next time or wunnah could figure that ot wunnahselves.

I gine hayso an drink lunch.